You know I’ve spent the last year and a half working out fairly regularly. I’ve grown so much stronger and have defined muscle tone. I can do push-ups and mountain climbers with the best of them.
I’ve also gained ten pounds.

And a double chin.
It’s frustrating. All those hours at the gym, working out with AJ, feet pounding the ground. Metabolism is an evil jerk. In my late twenties a good month of running could whip me right into shape. In my late thirties… nada.
It’s time for drastic action. Enter this.

This is not very delicious.
For the next six months I will be forswearing all grains, sugars, dairy, alcohol, and fruit - HA! Like I ever eat fruit. I will eat one meal like the one above every day and five additional prepared meals prescribed by a certified dietician.
It’s extreme. It’s embarrassing that it has to be this way, but I’m not ready to be a schlumpy mommy. I want to consider myself “hot” at least one more time in my life. Hot… what a loaded term.
Your first question is probably, “What diet are you doing?” I’m doing Medifast. And not the Medifast where I order a bunch of food online and try to navigate through it myself, I am doing weekly in-person meetings with a counselor where I will be weighed, measured, and sent home with food. A few people I told have responded with, “But that’s for really overweight people isn’t it?” It’s for anyone and hey, I need to lose a lot to reach my ideal weight based on my body composition, which, interestingly enough, was only one pound less than I told my counselor my goal weight was.
I’m not trying to be a skinny minnie, I know my body and where I feel the healthiest, it will never weigh 110 pounds. Hell, my boobs almost weigh that much. But I want to be healthy, I want to feel good, I want my pants to fit.
Next question: “Isn’t it really expensive?” Yup. Fortunately, my health insurance paid for part of the counseling fees, and the weekly food cost is actually less than what I would normally spend on food for myself per week, especially when I consider all the Indian food takeout and lunches I buy and that go directly to my ass. And let’s not even begin to figure out how much I’m going to save on WINE. <as a single tear runs down my cheek>
Many of you know that diabetes runs in my family; my grandfather had it and my mom has Type I – her body produces NO insulin. I had Gestational Diabetes, which puts me at a much higher risk for Type II Diabetes later in life. I see how my mom struggles with it (although she won’t quit smoking which only makes it worse AHEM). I know what a hassle it is to constantly monitor your blood sugar levels.
I do not want to go to there.
Why am I sharing this here if I consider it embarrassing? Because it’s about accountability, and putting myself out here helps me be more accountable. This nutrition plan is going to be a big part of my life for the next six months, it’s going to take a lot of work and a lot of saying no to dinners with friends and birthday cakes and happy hours. But it’s a hardship I am ready to take on.
Just don’t eat any ice cream cones in front of me….